Friday, January 31, 2014

Jan. 31, 2014 - Knock, Knock

I am not "knocking" a religion by this week's  FRIDAY FUNNY. 


In reality, I had a visit from our friends once a week when I was living in California.

Love their manners. Confused by their message.


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Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Jan. 28, 2014 - Romney's State of the Union

I watched the Netflix documentary, “Mitt,” this past weekend.  A cameraman followed Mitt Romney during parts of the 2008 Republican primary season and through the entire 2012 campaign.  It ended on election night 2012 with Romney’s loss to Barack Obama.

Throughout the film, I saw a different side of Romney.  I saw someone different than the person defined by the media.  He was optimistic, funny, and warm around his large family. Romney was authentic, straight forward, and honest.  These are not adjectives I associate with the current tenant of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.


What follows is a “WHAT IF?” scenario.  What if Romney had prevailed in November 2012?  The 45th President of the United States would now be preparing to deliver his State of the Union after his first full year in office.  I imagine it would go as follows: 

“My fellow Americans, I’m here tonight to report on the State of the Union.  I promised when taking office one year ago that I would not look to the past to assess blame, but I would press forward and seize opportunity for change and improvement.

I would like to personally thank private citizens: Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, John Boehner, and Mitch McConnell for voluntarily resigning their Congressional seats last January in order to end gridlock, to unify the country, and to start us in a new, positive direction.”

(Wait for long, long applause)

“Upon taking Office, I held true to my promise to repeal the Affordable Care Act. I’m happy to report the new Health, Exercise, Live, Perform or HELP Act will be ready for release this fall once we have completed full end-to-end system testing including provider payments and have ensured system security.  As we have discussed, the program will be rolled out gradually with a two state pilot, expanding to 15 states, and then to the full Union once all performance measurements including customer satisfaction are achieved. 

This plan does not claim to provide everything for everyone, but it is solid.  We were able to maintain the pre-exiting conditions clause and the dependents under 26 coverage components of the Affordable Care Act.  We have eliminated the job-killing mandates that caused harm to small businesses. We have been able to add the necessary modules of tort reform and interstate health insurance commerce that will allow for competition and lower premiums. In addition to the coverage for preventive screenings, we have added funded memberships to health clubs and fitness centers to promote healthy living.

I would like to thank Congress for expediting the Tax Reform Act of 2013.  By simplifying the Tax Code and eliminating unnecessary deductions, we will generate more revenue while lowering effective tax rates.  Through these actions, we have eliminated the need for 100,000 IRS agents. These agents will be offered paid enrollment in job-training programs for their future deployment as teachers in our new ‘Right-to-Work’ voucher-eligible school programs, run by the states.

Finally, the largest obstacle to our collective success has been our annual deficit and burdensome debt.  I pledge that the 28th Amendment to our Constitution, the Balanced Budget Amendment, will be ratified before the start of our next fiscal year on October 1, 2014.   We will not erase our $17 Trillion in debt in this generation, but our annual deficit will be ZERO, by law, going forward.

Now that we have adopted strategies to correct the direction of our country, it is time to address other significant issues that loom on the horizon.  Our 2014 goals will be to address the fiscal solvency of Social Security and Medicare.  We will also address TRUE comprehensive Immigration Reform.  To paraphrase President Kennedy on his commitment to going to the moon:

We choose to do these things not because they are easy, but because they are hard. 

The time to address Social Security, Medicare, and Immigration is NOW.

I want to thank Congress for their work and their efforts this past year.  The State of the Union is improving, but we are not finished. Let’s continue to work together for the next 36 months, the way we have for the last twelve.

God Bless You and God Bless the United State of America.”

Dream Over.

Monday, January 27, 2014

Jan. 27, 2014 - PPM-State of the (Dis)-Union

On Tuesday, we will endure President Obama’s 6th State of the Union Address (SOTU).

The SOTU was originally intended to provide Congress with an update on happenings in the Executive Branch of the government. Previously, some Presidents just sent a letter.  I, for one, miss the good old days.

Someone once said: "Tonight's State of the Union was full of the same empty rhetoric the American people have come to expect from this President." 

That someone was Senator Barack Obama on January 28, 2008, in response to then President Bush's State of the Union address.

To no one’s surprise, Obama has turned the SOTU into just another campaign stump speech.

Does anyone recall a memorable quote from one of President Obama’s previous SOTU speeches? 

Can anyone remember any substantial deliverables from the last five SOTU speeches?

Obama’s lone significant accomplishment is Obamacare.  By all accounts, the rollout of healthcare reform has been an unmitigated disaster.  The truth, uncommonly heard from the Obama regime, is that the worst of Obamacare will occur with the employer mandate next year.

White House sources have said that Obama will deliver an optimistic State of the Union address on Tuesday.  Obama will urge Congress to address economic issues like “Income Inequality.” 

Borrowing Al Gore’s catch phrase, it is an inconvenient truth that income inequality has increased in Obama’s first 5 years.  So will Obama distance himself from or denounce his own fiscal policies that have INCREASED income inequality?

Obama will promote raising the minimum wage.  Economists, business owners, AND job creators all predict that this will hurt the economy.

The President will also task Congress with extending jobless benefits, or Unemployment Insurance. While I am not opposed to helping someone in need, I have to ask for how long and at what cost?  Why is Obama opposed to having budget offsets to pay for the extension?

The latest inequality eradication that Obama has championed is college accessibility.  I disagree. Not everyone must go to college. We need individuals to do jobs that do not require a college education.  Does my electrician really need a Philosophy degree? Fourteen percent of restaurant servers now possess a college degree, which speaks volumes about the imbalance between education and the job market. 

Obama will talk about the need for jobs, yet he won’t address the Keystone XL pipeline delay.  Thousands of possible construction jobs remain a pipe dream.

I think we should address “Intelligence Inequality” if Obama thinks that minimum wage raises, unemployment insurance extensions, and higher college admissions (with more student debt) will improve our economy.


Topics I would like to hear about in the State of the Union, but won’t, are the IRS targeting scandal, the Benghazi cover-up, the NSA snooping, and the botched Fast and Furious program.
  
I did a non-scientific poll of four of my friends as to what they would like to hear from this year’s SOTU:

25% - A resignation
25% - The phrase “In conclusion”
25% – More about how he saved Detroit, killed Osama
25% - What Obama’s imaginary son is up to and what sports he won’t be allowed to play

I think I need less sarcastic friends.

I will be watching the SOTU speech hoping for another Joe Wilson moment.  Wilson is the Republican Congressman from South Carolina who shouted “You lie” during President Obama’s September 2009 speech to Congress about Obamacare.  I think someone owes Wilson an apology and a Nostradamus Award.

Obama famously said, “Elections have consequences.”  So do words, quotes, and yes, lies.

I’ll be live tweeting constructive comments on Tuesday night at @RevJJLewis


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Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Jan. 22, 2014 - Hypocrite in Chief

Does anyone else see the irony and hypocrisy of Obama's statement today marking the 41st anniversary of Roe V. Wade?

Obama trumpets that "Every woman should be able to make her own choices about her body and her health."

But I guess women (and men) can't be trusted (or allowed) to choose their healthcare and their doctor.

Monday, January 20, 2014

Jan. 20, 2014 - PPM - Race Cards

This week’s PET PEEVE MONDAY (PPM) is the “Race Card.”

President Obama played it again this week when he was confronted by his falling approval numbers.

Obama is quoted in the New Yorker’s January 27, 2014 edition:

“There’s no doubt that there’s some folks who just really dislike me because they don’t like the idea of a black president,” 

REALLY?
You were elected TWICE?
Mathematically, over 60% disapprove of your performance.  Many of those folks actually voted for you.  Did they just forget they were RACISTS at the time they voted for you?

Obama must have bought a new deck of “Race Cards” because he has gone through the first 52 cards already.

I would have more respect for the Obama, the Man (?), if he just would fess up and say:

“Hey look.  I was a great Community Organizer, but I was really over matched in this job.  I should have tried the Senate thing for a few terms before SELLING myself to the media and the uninformed voters.  I’ll think I’ll go now and make some more speeches.  Do I still get that great lifetime pension?”

The only down side of Obama’s resignation would be Biden’s promotion to the Big Chair.  Then again, it would probably be less dangerous to the integrity of our Constitution.

Biden would probably spend the remainder of Obama’s term confusing the “Push” or “Pull” choice on the door to the Oval Office.

Below is the current status of Obama's "To Do List."



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Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Jan. 14, 2014 - No Yolk

This is what the once mighty CNN now covers.  I received the below "High Alert" text because of "Breaking News."


James Earl Jones will be rolling in his grave .... at a yet to be determined time and place.  Stay tuned.  Hopefully, Jones' death will also be treated as a significant (News?) event like egg throwing.

Sunday, January 12, 2014

Jan. 12, 2014 - Snow Days

I was cleaning up my DVR tonight and decided to watch the Jimmy Fallon special from January 5th. It was on the night before the "Polar Vortex" hit and all the schools closed the next day.

Two of my children came into the room and saw the school closings scrolling across the bottom of the screen.


They immediately jumped to the conclusion that there was no school tomorrow. Who was I to destroy their joy and excitement?

I guess the word of the day is "Gullible." 

Tomorrow's word at 6 a.m. when I wake them for school will undoubtedly be "Despondency."

I always try to make the most of a "teaching moment" with my kids. 

I DO enjoy this parenting thing.

Friday, January 10, 2014

Jan. 10, 2014 - Friday Funny - Why Women Live Longer

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is titled "This is Why Women Live Longer."


I can't say I haven't tried a variable of this at home. But have you ever tried to dust off ceiling fans in a two story great room?

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Tuesday, January 07, 2014

Jan. 7, 2014 - Magnet Schools

I used today's school closing to do some "Home Schooling."

My daughter never knows when the dishwater needs emptying.  I devised a magnet approach that even she should understand.


If the Hannah Montana magnet is on the dishwasher, the dishes are "clean." 

If the Miley Cyrus magnet is on the dishwasher, the dishes are "dirty, filthy, nasty."

Monday, January 06, 2014

Jan. 6, 2014 - PPM - Global Warming

This week's PET PEEVE MONDAY (PPM) is the term commonly known as "Global Warming."

School was cancelled today because the high temperature was targeted to be 2 degrees. Tomorrow it will be even colder.

Al Gore made some ridiculous assertions and assumptions in his Book, "An Inconvenient Truth."


To think, we were 538 Florida voters away from making this CLOWN our President.  THAT is an Inconvenient Truth!!!

I think at the price of $1 per book makes Al Gore's book a perfect fire starter.

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Friday, January 03, 2014

Jan. 3, 2014 - Friday Funny - Mystery

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is something I'm going to have to try the next time I'm at the library.

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Thursday, January 02, 2014

Jan. 2, 2014 - Safety Record?

We made it till 10:39 a.m. on New Year’s Day until we suffered the first casualty of 2014.


Jax was playing tackle football on the stairs with a much larger cousin and put his glasses in his pocket so they wouldn't fall off and get broken.

Wednesday, January 01, 2014

Jan. 1, 2014 - New Year's Resolutions

After some superficial self-reflections, 20 minutes of Wii Yoga, and a couple of cocktails, I determined all is well.  

Happy 2014, 2015, ....