May 24, 2019 - Friday Funny- Grill Season

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is timely as we start to enter the summer grilling season.

All I can say, is it about time Fat Dads get some respect and privilege.

Dec. 24, 2018 - Friday Funny - Hipster XMAS

NO WORDS.

July 13, 2018 - Friday Funny- Movin' on Somewhere

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is a comment on the work ethic of SOME Americans. 

Ironically, I once hired "Two Men and a Truck" to move me less than a mile away.  They some how got lost, misplaced some of my belongings, (video game systems), and smelled of pot when they arrived 6 hours later.  Good times....for some.

June 29, 2018 - Friday Funny - Flare Up

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is a compilation of some YouTube videos about traffic stops.

 Kentucky State trooper pulled a car over on I-75 about 8 miles south of Richmond, Kentucky. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Lexington to do a show for the Childrens' Hospital. He didn't want to be late.

The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn't give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.

The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him.

While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the State Troopers car. A drunken good old boy from London got out, watched the performance, then went over to the Trooper's car, opened the rear door and got in.

The trooper observed him and went over to his car, opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, “You might as well take me to jail, cause there ain't no way I can pass that test.”

June 1, 2018 - Friday Funny - Personal AD

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is good.  I can't offer much more or it would be a spoiler.  

For the record, I like dogs less than I like people.  

May 18, 2018 - Friday Funny - De-Motivator Speaker

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is how I love parenting and motivating my children.

Because of the way they calculate grades at her high school, the end of semester test can be devalued if you have done well in the previous 2 quarters.  (2 quarters = 1 semester)

Her argument was she only needed a C and a D on the exams to maintain her class standing.  

Parenting is not that hard, especially if you decide to ignore all the published materials on the subject.

May 4, 2018 - Friday Funny - Heart Warming

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY was only funny because it was a non-emergency. 

I was literally mending fences and tending to my garden when my iWatch gave me a heart rate warning. I immediately contacted my personal physician. I did not receive a phone call, just a “WTF” text response. 

Not sure if I should be concerned about the casual response of my 25 year-long personal relationship with my health-care provider or the fact that Apple has probably shared my data with my life insurance company and my premiums just quadrupled.

Feb. 16, 2018 - Friday Funny - Brutus, The WINNER!

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is about my Dog. 

Yesterday, they announced the winner of the Westminster Dog Show: A Bichon Frise (dog on the left)

The dog on the right is my Bichon Frise: Brutus (he's 14)

I had to spend most of the day explaining to Brutus that we are ALL Winners. To help his low self-esteem, I'm going to put Brutus in the dryer, fluff cycle.This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is about my Dog. 

Jan. 12, 2018 - Friday Funny - No Cold Cash

This week’s FRIDAY FUNNY is another FROZEN reference.

I can only reflect on the week I spent on a Disney Cruise just after the movie, FROZEN, was released.  The Frozen music was piped into every hallway, bathroom, and what I thought was a “safe space” on the ship.

Bottom line, I bet Elsa would have dropped the Princess act if her funds were, in fact, frozen.  I’m guessing it would have been more like the Wizard of Oz Witch of the East than of the Witch of the North, directionally speaking.

Jan. 5, 2018 - Funny Friday - Let It Go

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is the alternative response to the Global Warning narrative.

I've been at a beach in South Carolina the last week where the roads have been closed due to ice and snow. This weather is unprecedented. The local municipalities have no equipment, materials, or ability to clear the roads.

I planned in advance to have enough food, beverages, and firewood to survive.  I promised that I would not be bitter, and that I would LET IT GO, LET IT GO.

July 21, 2017 - Friday Funny - Going for the Juggler

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY  was sent to me by a Kentucky friend.

A Kentucky State trooper pulled a car over on I-75 about 8 miles south of Richmond, Kentucky. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Lexington to do a show for the Childrens' Hospital. He didn't want to be late.

The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn't give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.

The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him.

While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the State Troopers car. A drunken good old boy from London got out, watched the performance, then went over to the Trooper's car, opened the rear door and got in.    

The trooper observed him and went over to his car, opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, “You might as well take me to jail, cause there ain't no way I can pass that test.”

June 30, 2017 - Friday Funny - Retirement Update

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY marks 12 years since I retired on July 1, 2005.

It's been a fun run.

I haven;'t written a book, but I have over 1000 blog posts.  If you put them all together, that's a book.

I haven't dropped the extra 10 pounds.  But then again, I haven't gained another 10.

I did retire from playing baseball in an old man's league.  After my last trip to the orthopedic surgeon to look at my right shoulder, he noted that surgery could be performed, but their usual policy is "you don't prune a dead tree."

I did spend more time with the family.  They can tell you if that was a good thing.

But more than anything, I think the below picture sums it up.

I'M NOT DONE YET.

Just Saying.

Feb. 24, 2017 - Friday Funny - Hate Working

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is a screen capture of a car in traffic.

My analysis is this:

The driver proudly placed his Obama bumper sticker in 2012 and drove around pleasantly for 4 years.

The Vanity plates "H8 WRKN" was only added after the Trump election and the driver found out certain government entitlements may be limited in the future unless you worked.

I could be wrong.

Just Saying

Feb. 17, 2017 - Friday Funny - Putting it in CON-TEXT

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is how you can turn the tables on your teenagers.

I got tired of the constant texts from my kids.  They would text me, so I would call them.  Instead of answering the phone, they would text back. EXTREMELY ANNOYING.

I decided to play their "Text Game" and added some Emojis for effect.

Soon, they changed the group chat name and implored me to STOP texting.

Now they answer my calls.

Just Saying.

Feb. 10, 2017 - Friday Funny - Be Like Bill

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is actually also a Public Service Announcement (PSA).

Unfortunately in these divisive times, many people would rather hurl insults on the internet rather than to just disagree and move on.  So many people post from the safety of the Momma's basement knowing there is no recourse.

Just Saying.

Feb. 3, 2017 - Friday Funny - That's Ducked Up

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY (FF) is a shout out to our country's policemen.

At a time, when they are under siege, literally and figuratively, this newspaper article made me laugh.

Just Saying.

Jan. 20, 2017 - Friday Funny - Moving Day

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY is MOVING DAY.

I wonder how many of the Hollywood elites who said they would move if Donald Trump was elected, will actually move.

Just Saying.

Jan. 13, 2017 - Friday Funny - Trump Cabinet

This week's Friday Funny is a result of a long car ride because you can't play "Tunes" forever.

Hardly anyone thought Donald Trump would be elected the nest President last November. So, while driving 10 hours form Ohio to South Carolina last August, a life partner and I decided to propose a possible Trump Cabinet, should he be elected.  

Here were the proposed results:

VP - Donald Trump (why not get the greatest)

Secretary of State - Mel Gibson

Secretary of Treasurer - Bernie Madoff

Education Secretary - Nick Nolte

Health and Human Services Secretary - Woody Allen

Energy Secretary - Richard Simmons

Interior Secretary - Sophia Varga

Attorney General - Hillary Clinton

EPA Secretary - not necessary

Agriculture Secretary - Woody Harrelson

Defense Secretary - Bill Belichek

Labor Secretary - Mrs.  Duggart

Transportation Secretary -  Gary Busey

VA Secretary - Jane Fonda

Homeland Security - Eric Snowden

New Departments: 

Dept of Excess Winning- Charlie Sheen

Wall building - Jackie Chan / George Lopez

We will see how the actual cabinet plays out. I'm sure my choices would not Make America Great Again.

As an American, we always want our President to succeed. Good Luck, President Trump.

Just Saying. 

Dec. 23, 2016 - Friday Funny - Reindeer Games

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY has a timely Christmas theme.

Too funny. I only wish I had a Santa suit, because there is plenty of (rein)deer road kill in Ohio.

Dec. 9, 2016 - FF - Never Trumper's Merry XMas

This week's FRIDAY FUNNY (FF) is dedicated to those disgruntled non-Trump voters.

It's been a month since the election and we are just over a month from his Inauguration. 

It seems some people will be delivering coal to their kids for Christmas.

Actually, it probably won't be coal but some earth-friendly, non fossil fuel substitute.  Maybe a voided, outdated, carbon off-set gift certificate.  

You may want to check Al Gore's web site to see what is available.  Just stay away from the gently used sauna/spa bathrobe section.  Just saying.