September 1 - Friday Funny - Eight is Enough

This week, the International Committee of Astronomers (ICA) decided to de-list Pluto as a planet.

The ICA spokesperson announced, “We are sorry to announce this Solar System right-sizing. However, due to economic and galactic conditions, we were unable continue a working relationship with Pluto. We've really enjoyed working with Pluto in the past and wish it no ill will.”

Pluto’s legal representatives were quick to deny the rumors about Pluto having Venus Envy. They also denied any nefarious link between Pluto and Jupiter’s moons or Saturn’s rings. Pluto’s lawyers also claimed that Pluto’s off color jokes directed at Uranus were taken out of context.

Pluto's press agent released this statement, "While Pluto is saddened by this turn of events, it's not bitter. Pluto looks on this as an opportunity to spend more time with his family.”

When reached for comment, Bill Clinton indicated that he understood the problem. He stated, “Well, it depends on what your definition of a planet is?”

Pluto, a planet since 1930, was ineligible for any early planet retirement benefits. While Pluto was 76 years old on Earth time, it was only 28 seconds old when converted to Light Years.

Additional impacts from the announcement included:

• School textbooks will have to be re-printed.
• Toys R Us will need to recall all Solar System mobiles.
• Two episodes of Star Trek will need to be erased.
• Three characters from Battlestar Galactica will need to be rewritten.

And most importantly, my 4th grade science teacher, Sister Marie Tress, will need to re-calculate my grade. I knew there were only eight planets. Which is different from her assertion that I only knew eight planets.

I think it is ironic that a planet that is so closely associated with Disney is declassified.

I guess - It IS A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL.