June 9, 2008 - PPM - Poor Haircut Choices

This week’s PET PEEVE MONDAY is PARENT-INDUCED BAD HAIRCUTS.

It is not the kind of haircuts that most people receive. It is the haircut that is forced upon children by their Jerry Springer watching, chain smoking, tattoo collecting, worst yard in the trailer park, parents. My apologies to Jerry's law-abiding transvestites without children that also fall into this demographic. I mean no harm.

People, why would you subject your child to this act of uncivil disobedience? You should be made to wear YOUR OWN hair in a Mohawk or Mullet (known as Billy-Ray Cyrus career-ender). You inflict your poor style choices upon a defense-less child. It is nothing more than a form of child abuse.

Finally, one school in Parma Ohio took action and suspended a student for sporting a Mohawk. It is about time.

I’ve put green coloring in my kid’s hair for St. Patrick’s Day. I spray paint their hair on most OHIO STATE football Saturdays.

These hair treatments last less than 24 hours and will not require professional therapy. My kids' need for therapy will have NOTHING to do with their hair color or style selection.

These people that follicle-ly abuse their children are the same people that see nothing wrong with putting a dress on a dog.

Come on people. Leave your kids’ hair alone. It’s not their choice to be an individual, it is YOURS.

They have enough of a challenge with you as their parent, without you making their ability to have a normal life, harder.